Stealing
Tue, 03/24/2009 - 09:05
My son went to his grandparents house for 5 days during spring break. He came back on Sunday afternoon. Later that evenging he told me that grandma gave him 3 keys. I looked at the keys and knew right away that she did not give them to him. After about an hour he admitted that he stoled them from her church that morning. On monday he went to school and came home with a bright pink plastic toy cell phone. He said the teacher gave it to him for being good. Again I knew that she didn't give him the phone. After about another hour of talking to him not screaming and yelling he finally told me he stoled the phone from a little girl at school. He asked me what I was going to do about it. I told him I was going to go to school the next day and take the phone back and tell the teacher what he did and he would have to take whatever discipline she said. Then he asked me if he could play with the phone and I said NO. He then got angry and mad and had a really big meltdown, after it was over I asked him why he got angry and he said because I wouldn't let him play with HIS phone. I explained to him that it wasn't his phone to play with. And if you steal something you do not get to keep it. Any advice?
Comments
Children with RAD often steal.
They place little or no value on things or belongings. Think about the kid who moved in and out of foster care--every time they were moved they left almost everything that the owned behind. Many of these children moved from home to home with what belongings they had in garbage bags.
Stealing provides two emotional outlets.
1) They are filling a void created by NOT having things when younger.
2) It gives them a sense of control.
These kids often have under-developed conscience. They have to be taught what is right and wrong. Just as you need to tell a toddler hundreds of times to not hit, treat the dog nicely, don't steal - you need to train your kid as if he is a toddler.
You need to give simple and understandable reasons why stealing is bad when it happens. It is essential that the opportunities for theft are kept to a minimum. Use explanations that would make sense to a two or three year old kid.